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The misadventures of the giant non-sexual dildo named Ned!

Born near the California border of Western Nevada, a dildo was born. But not just any dildo, a dildo looking for love. You see, it’s not that Ned couldn’t find women, it’s that no woman could tame Ned.

Having little to no luck in his hometown, Ned decided it was time for a change of scenery. So he packed up his balls, and headed North. After a brief stop in Seattle, and another crossing the border into Canada, Ned found himself amidst the mountains of beautiful British Columbia.

Having wandered over the mountains, Ned found himself to the doorstep of a couple who generously took him in. From then on Ned has just tried to fit in, adapt to normal life, and continue his ever burdened search for love.

Welcome to ‘The misadventures of the giant non-sexual dildo named Ned!’